Vivian's Birth Day

I'm going to be totally honest.  I was petrified to give birth the second time.  Evelyn was NOT an easy delivery, and I was in pretty rough shape for quite a few weeks after she was born.  To the extent that I seriously contemplated one and done after her arrival.  And it's really not true what they say about you forgetting all about it after the baby comes.  But, about a year after Evelyn was born we started discussing the possibility of another baby.  I grew up with three siblings and Steve with one, and we decided we wanted Evelyn to grow up with a sibling.  I still remembered everything about Evelyn's delivery, but we were going to go for it anyway. 

So for the nine months leading up to Vivian's arrival, I was kind of obsessed with how big I was getting, what my exact due date was, and the possibility of being induced again.  I didn't want to get too big because I was sure that was the cause for the rough delivery.  I also didn't really want to be induced again.  I went for a third trimester ultra sound and everything pointed to another large baby.  The doctors I saw agreed that this was looking like a larger baby, but they didn't think it was going to be as big as Evelyn, who weighed in at 9 lbs. 4 oz.  They also assured me that all deliveries are different.  That a rough first delivery didn't mean anything when it came to the second.  I was not convinced. 

As my due date approached and passed, I prepared myself to be induced again.  And as much as I didn't want to be induced, there is something really great about knowing the end is in sight and exactly when it will happen.  I'm not generally the kind of person who needs things super planned out.  I like a surprise (we didn't find out what either of our babies were going to be), I like to be spontaneous, but when it comes to giving birth I really needed to know when it was going to happen.  Which makes no sense when I say how badly I did not want to have to be induced. 

But there we were, on March 25, heading to the hospital for my induction.  Surprisingly I slept pretty well the night before, despite being a hot mess about what was about to happen the next day.  I was absolutely petrified, even more so than the first time.  At that point I think my worries were more about what this meant for Evelyn than what I was about to go through.  We made a stop to drop her off at school, and that's when I lost it.  I wouldn't even walk in.  I gave her a kiss through the window and Steve walked her in. 

After a stop for coffee for Steve and Kelly (my personal labor and delivery nurse), and a donut for me, we arrived at the hospital.  I was still very anxious, but my favorite doctor was on call, and I knew that between her and Kelly, they would make a plan that was best for me.  Things got started, and I was surprised that I didn't start having contractions pretty quickly, as I did with Evelyn.  I was convinced nothing was happening and in my head I was now preparing for a C-section since it didn't seem like this baby was going to come at all. 

Surprisingly, I was actually dilating and after a few hours things really started moving.  My contractions started quick and I got an epidural.  Suddenly I was 10 cm dilated.  I then prepared myself for hours of pushing, which is what happened with Evelyn.  The nurse had me do a push just to see what would happen, and almost immediately told me to stop and called for the doctor.  About 4 pushes and less than five minutes later, Vivian Marie had arrived.  She was 8 lbs. 10 oz., and just a little bit longer than her big sister at 20 3/4 inches.  I was absolutely shocked!  The doctors were right...each delivery is completely different.