A Public Service Announcement...

A week or so ago I was complaining to a friend about all of the incredibly insensitive things that people say to someone who is pregnant.  It may have been more than complaining.  I was pretty perturbed by some of the things people feel they can say.  I guess people got the word that it's not okay to touch a pregnant woman's belly anymore, so now I guess people think they can just make comments on how you look.  So, I bring to you the top 5 things you should NEVER say to a pregnant woman, or at least not to me!

5. "Are you sure you aren't having twins?"  Of course I'm sure...but thanks for implying that I'm so big there must be two babies in there. 

 4. "You'll never make it to your due date!"  Again...the implication that I'm ginormous.  The only good thing about this comment is that it makes me all the more determined to get to and past my due date, despite how uncomfortable I am. 

 3. "I don't think you could get any bigger!"  Well, in fact I can get bigger.  But thanks. 

 2. "Are you as uncomfortable as you look?"  Well now that you mention it, I hadn't realized just how uncomfortable I was until you pointed it out to me. 

I thought long and hard about if I should include this last thing to never say to a pregnant woman because I don't want to offend anyone, but I consulted with my people and have been told to just go with it!

1. "You're having a boy/girl BECAUSE..."  It's not about having a guess.  It's fun to take a guess about what someone is having, and I don't mind when people tell me their guess.  It's the BECAUSE that ends up driving me nuts.  You're having a boy BECAUSE you're carrying totally different from your last pregnancy.  Seriously?!?!  It was over two years ago...I can't remember what I ate yesterday, but you remember what I looked like two years ago??  Then proceed to tell me I'm carrying all in front, which is also exactly what people told me last time.  I had some friends tell me that they were told they were having a girl BECAUSE the baby was stealing all of their beauty.  Honestly??

 
On the other hand...here are some things that are always alright to say to a pregnant lady. 

5. "You look beautiful!"  I was in Starbucks the other day and a total stranger came up to me and said that all pregnant women are just beautiful and that I looked wonderful.  Totally made my day. 

4. "Would you like a foot rub?  Or your back rubbed?"  Probably a little weird if a stranger says this, but alright if you know the person.

3. "Can I bring you some ice cream? Chocolate?  Cake?"  The answer is always yes, and don't forget the milk!

2. "You're totally rockin' those horizontal stripes!"  I'm totally scared to wear horizontal stripes at any other time than being pregnant, and I have a friend who makes it her job to point out how great they look on a pregnant woman.  :)

And the absolute best thing you can say to a pregnant woman...

1. "You're going to be a great mom!" or "Evelyn is going to be such a great big sister because you're such a great mom!"  Probably the hardest part of a first pregnancy is wondering how you're going to do once that little person comes out, and then you spend the subsequent pregnancies worrying about how your kid(s) are going to handle a new baby.  A little reassurance that it's going to be fine is exactly what a pregnant woman needs to hear!


So there you have it.  The things to NEVER say to a pregnant woman, and the things you should be saying to a pregnant woman.  I have to tell you all, I came up with five things that drive me nuts in about 5 minutes.  It took me a lot longer and I had to reach out to some friends for ideas about the positive things to say.  What did people say to you while pregnant that totally rubbed you the wrong way, or totally made your day?